Well it’s been a bit since I’ve written you all, hasn’t it? That’s only partially my fault (though let’s be honest, nothing is ever really my fault *prayer-hands*). The last six weeks have been a whirlwind of activity, and instead of complain-agizing (my new term for complaining* and apologizing) about the various reasons why I wasn’t able to write to you all, I figured I would turn it into this month’s newsletter. Plz enjoy!
*I should note that nothing that happened to me in the last six weeks is actually worthy of complaint. In fact, everything was quite good. I say this so that no one can get annoyed at me for whining about good stuff, when in fact, I was not whining and if you assumed I was, that’s actually on you. Aren’t you glad I’m back?
I went to South Carolina for the Jewish holiday of Passover
Passover is my favorite holiday because it’s like a second Thanksgiving just with some stupid songs. When I hear the four questions beat drop, I absolutely go NUTS!!! When we bang on the table to sing deiyanu, I lose my FREAKING MIND!!!! When I discover what my father bought for two zuzim?? I go CHA GAD YAAAAASS!!!!
Anyway passover in sunny South Carolina was lovely and sweaty and I took my first plunge of the season before we all had to leave the pool because a kid took a shit in it. Love!
I went to Toronto!
As I said in my instagram dump, Toron was freaking sick nasty!!!! (trying to bring sick nasty back, is it working?) We went to Toronto Island (sick), we saw a baseball game (nasty), we did a gin tasting and absolutely hated it! (sick nasty!!! It IS working!!!) I had a blast being gay with Al in Canada, where being gay is like, basically a requirement. We had to kiss to enter every single building. Catch UP America!!
One of the highlights of the trip was a Niagara Falls tour that I did solo. It was my first time ever traveling by myself, and I had a blast. I fully leaned in to being an embarrassing tourist; I probably asked one thousand people to take pictures of me. I had a lot of time to reflect on things like growing up and growing old, caring for responsibilities and how we care for each other. JK, I didn’t do any of that. The only thing I reflected on was “is it weird that I decided to eat soup for lunch in front of all these strangers? Probably.”
Al and I moved in together!
Wha wha whaaaat?! Yes honey. After almost 3 years of schlepping our stuff in between each other’s apartment, we finally decided to schlep ALL of our stuff into a new apartment. We live in gorgeous Park Slope! A stone’s throw away from a frozen yogurt place and the girlies know how much I love yogurt! I gotta have one every day! My tummy simply howls for those probiotics!!! I love our apartment, I love yogurt, and I love P Slope. What more can I say???
I went to the White House Correspondents’ Dinner?!
Wha wha WHAAAAT?! I know!!! I was lucky enough to help the great Roy Wood Jr figure out how to dunk on Don Lemon at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner this year, and I think we did a solid job. This whole experience was a dream come true, and if you don’t believe me, just ask my journal! It has things like “mrs Lily Correspondents Dinner” doodled in the margins. Best night of my life vibes <333
Allison had a birthday and we went to… (holds back tears)… the Taylor Swift concert
Congratulations to Al on being crowned the birthday King. Charles eat your heart out, BITCH!! Al turned 26 which means we are officially the same age which means our relationship is no longer scandalous. What am I to do???
And then… readers… DEAR readers I should say… we went to the lovely city of Philadelphia to bask in the glory of Taylor Alison (!) Swift. I didn’t want to spoil the concert for myself, so I’ll withhold the details for the sake of my DEAR readers, but let’s just say… I was wonderstruck… blushing ALL the way home!!! I am forever changed because of this show was and I thank the dear lord in heaven that we have an artist as magnificent as Taylor Swift in this lifetime. Matty Healy controversy aside, Baruch hashem to Taylor and Baruch Hashem to the lord for giving us good weather. This concert made me believe in god again.
Those are almost all of the highlights from the last 6 weeks, thank you for bearing with me and even for reading this!!! I hope it was entertaining at the very least. I’ll be back again soon with more nonsense! Love ya!
Here’s one concert for you, it’s a minor spoiler I suppose, but we all knew she was gonna do this one right?
Xoxo